I am a reasonably intelligent person, but by no means more so than average. My formal education has consisted of 12 years of school, with an attempt and fail at college. In spite of my ambivalence towards “school”, I love to learn. It took me a very long time to realize this, and to embrace the fact that although I didn’t follow the path that was preached as the way to success, college, grad school, career, I am living the life of my dreams.
There is nothing wrong with wanting more for your kids than you had, and this was the driving reason my parents had for working 7 days a week in the businesses they founded and operated to give us the opportunities that they did not have. They struggled and worked countless hours, days, years, in order to send us to private school, pay for piano lessons and any other extracurricular activities that we desired. Looking back I know that they sacrificed their own pleasures to make sure we never lacked. I know that I am incredibly blessed, not just because of the childhood that I had, but because of the example that they set for me. Once I got over the self inflicted regret over not following the path they had laid out for me of higher education, I was able to clearly see that I have learned the most valuable lessons from them as my teachers.
I have learned that hard work, consistency, kindness and gratitude are the secrets to a life of fulfillment, at least for me. I always give my all, this leaves no room for regret. I have learned to be real, to be honest always, and to not fear rejection. I strive to always be kind. Most of all, I have learned the secret of gratitude. So although I am not extra intelligent, I am becoming self aware. I am a constant student of my own nature, and as I continue to understand myself and my motivations, it gives me greater perspective on how to live my life. Awareness gives me the insight to see that I always have a choice, whether to react or to respond. To pause, look inside, and respond whenever I catch an erupting reaction, and to use the insights about myself to better understand the people I meet. Self awareness has the added side effect of turning on a part of your brain that helps you also become more aware of others and their needs, struggles, and desires.
Learning this about myself has taught me how much of an impact I am having on my own kids. I see them and I am grateful, proud. They are exemplifying the qualities that I see in my own parents, hard work, consistency, kindness, and gratitude. I practice love and acceptance with them, and work to release them from any expectations I may subconsciously project on them. I know that they alone are the determiners of their own personal path to a life of fulfillment, and for this awareness I am Blessed with a capital “B”.