patience

I struggle with impatience, I know it is one of my weaknesses. When I decide I want to do something, it is like lighting a fuse on a stick of dynamite. I begin to become more and more aware of the thing I want to do or be or see or try. It’s especially hard when I can envision how I want something to be. The gap between where I see things being and where they actually are is the testing ground for my practice of patience. It takes time to build a business, it takes vision and consistency and few rewards for the hours spent building the foundation.

We may have been in this business for 17 years, but when I look at the path that has let us to where we are today, I see that James’s first restaurant job working as a busboy at Dino’s was just one of the places where the seeds were sown in the field that is our life today. The Saturdays in high school that I didn’t want to work at my mom’s bridal shop were the path to learning to sacrifice for the family business. The winters in Tahoe were where James learned the value of a free meal while holding two jobs, one of them at the ski slopes and one in restaurants. Being able to keep the proceeds from the little shop my parents helped my sister and I set up when we were in our early teens was the beginning of my lessons on managing money. The years in Maui where James had his first experiences with entrepreneurship, where he learned the value of being the boss. The moonlighting I did making wedding cakes while I worked on bookkeeping for my mom’s company were the testing grounds for being self motivated. The excitement of having something new to offer the community when James brought espresso to Castro Valley in the early days at Cookie Express was the inspiration for innovation. The realities of starting a new business with young children and little financial resources…bouncing checks and selling tires to pay rent…learning to be resourceful. All the time spent along the ride we were learning the lessons and building the foundation of our lives now.

So my impatience gets tempered when I reflect back and see that it’s a process. Every step along the way is a chance to move in the direction of my vision. I can clearly remember the feeling when we could not do what other people around us were doing. We could not take vacations, we could not buy cars, we put every dollar back into the business, and all of our energy as well. Our kids grew up in the restaurant. The kids came in while we worked in the morning and after school, and watched cartoons while they did their homework. The train tables we have in our restaurants were to help entertain our kids while we worked. The photos of our family on the walls are because the restaurant is an extension of our family, and we spent most of our awake time at the original Denica’s in Dublin.

This world of right now can only perpetuate the impatience, which is why reflecting on the journey and the building blocks to today remind me of how life unfolds with our without my impatience.