Category: business

I was at a dinner party recently and was talking to Martin about his son. Martin’s son had graduated from college with a degree in psychology, and was contemplating what to do next. His son’s perspective of his choices was limited to going into the field of counseling, but the desire to sit with people and work through their personal issues was not a big pull. Martin, who I speculate did NOT have a degree in psychology, used his skills to help his son expand his vision. “I told him, well son, sales is all about psychology, and life and business are about sales. Why don’t you use what you have learned and see what you can do to build a business?” Great advice! I may be biased, but I am a big fan of entrepreneurs and I love it when people are inspired to go into business for themselves.

This got me thinking about the thought of life being about sales, and its true. When you are parenting it definitely is, and my kids are great at selling me on what they want, and I definitely needed to be a really good salesperson to convince them to take a jacket to school or eat their veggies! In business of course sales play a big part, not only with the client or customer, but also with your team. It may be more subtle, since the team is not actually purchasing something tangible, but buy-in is vital to the creation of a healthy growing culture.

“Will they buy in to my vision?” I’ve heard this question from aspiring entrepreneurs, and its not about the vision. It’s about the leader. People buy in to YOU. People will rarely support even a worthy cause unless they have first bought in to the leader. That’s why corporations use celebrity endorsers, we automatically think that someone who is famous and successful at sports, music, or acting has credibility, and as such the product they endorse also gets that benefit.

The question comes down to have you given them reason to buy in to you? This requires building trust. We have seen this in action in our business as sometimes people we have placed in leadership positions end up falling flat on their face. When they start out they have a level of respect that comes automatically since they are in a position of authority, but from there it is up to the salesmanship and leadership of the person whether they succeed or fail. More than once we have seen a potentially great leader neglect the important part of the leadership process that requires you to build relationships and the trust of the team before attempting to make major changes. Buy in takes time, it requires integrity and a track record of credibility so that the people you are leading know and believe you will be there for them no matter what. It requires being honest with them, and sincerely taking an interest in their goals and helping them grow. Ultimately it requires patience and the work to build the relationships that will bring you to your vision.

“If you fail to prepare you are preparing to fail.” – John Maxwell

This quote was at the forefront of my mind as I prepared for my meeting with the leaders we are helping to grow in our company. The most important thing to remember when leading a meeting is to know your outcome. My outcome was to add value to them and ensure that they left the meeting uplifted. The absolute importance of taking the time to connect with the people you are leading is non-negotiable. My flexible agenda when I lead a small meeting goes like this:

1. Set the expectation (Tell them why they are there. Most people are sitting there thinking to themselves, why are we meeting? What is this about?)
2. Appreciation (Let them know how much you need them and appreciate them)
3. Intention (Let them know your goal is to add value and that you value their time. Start and end on time.)
4. You go last (Ask questions before sharing your story or message)
5. Anything Else? (When people are sharing and communicating with you, I always ask “What else”, never “is that all”. This keeps the communication open.)
6. Conclusion (Recap and summarize your message, while thanking them for contributing)

I look at my meetings as an opportunity to collaborate and connect with the people that I am meeting with. Many minds are smarter than one mind, and there is a synergy when people with a shared vision begin thinking about solutions and ideas. The ability to nurture this incredible group power and be open to the direction it takes you is a super-power when it comes to growing your business. The more you grow yourself and your own leadership abilities, the more you can lift the people you are leading. I am being pushed upwards to grow by the emerging leaders that we are developing, I learn from them as I teach them, its an amazingly beautiful thing.

Culture is a living growing organism. Miso, yogurt, kombucha, sauerkraut…all contain it. It needs the right environment to grow and to thrive. We are encouraged to include it in our diet because it contains active, live probiotics that help to keep us healthy. In your organization, in your family, in your country, you have a culture, whether you are creating it intentionally or not. Just like in in food, it needs the right environment to grow. Like foods, if your culture doesn’t have the right environment, it can spoil and turn toxic.

We are constantly in the process of nurturing the culture in our organization. We know that if you neglect the important things, like listening, really listening, the environment can and will change. The good news is that your culture has muscle memory. Well the good news and the bad. If your culture was not conducive to growth and love and teamwork, it can easily slip back there without strong leadership. When a culture has started to slip, as it can, you’d better pay attention and get in there before apathy starts its alluring pull back to the starting point. That the pull is like a tug of war, with the followers becoming stronger than the leader. Discord and inertia and even sabotage can and will happen when the culture is slipping. But muscle memory- it can bring you right back up to where you need to be with the right leadership.

Every problem, every issue, is a leadership issue. Without a strong leader who listens and cares and lives what they teach it is impossible to sustain a positive culture. Turning around a slip, or even the act of constantly creating and growing a culture entails connecting with the key people on your team. These are the green leaders and top performers, the 20% that are producing 80% of the results.

Connect and talk to your people. Ask them what their biggest challenges are. And help solve them. Listen. Follow up and follow through. And listen some more. If you don’t care, no one else will either. Celebrate the direction while keeping the goal in your sights. Remember that it is the little things that you do consistently that stack and compound and build the culture, be intentional about your habits.

Do you want to go into business for yourself so you can have more time? More freedom, more money? Let me tell you that you will get none of those things, not at first. Being self employed is not for the weak. If I can talk you out of it, you should go do something else. It takes a do whatever it takes mindset to not only launch but especially to grow a business. The successful entrepreneurs I know are a scrappy bunch. They are driven, motivated. They can be stubborn, yet they need to know they will be constantly growing. They have a strong opinion on the things that they will not compromise on in their business. For my father one of the things was his phone system. He insisted that no matter how much his company grew, his clients would reach a real person when they called. After my 3 disconnected phone calls and “touch 3 for technical support”, “I’m sorry, please repeat your selection” frustrating call to Directv yesterday I can really appreciate this as a standard. In our restaurant business we will not sacrifice quality for price. This is a non-negotiable standard.

I grew up in a family of entrepreneurs, so it was a natural flow for me to open my own business, but even with that foundation it has been a steep mountain to climb. The rewards are tremendous, we have been able in our business to provide jobs for so many people we know and in our family, we have been blessed to be able to work together as husband and wife and with our kids, we have amazing positive fun people who we get to work with, and we have the freedom to choose who works with us. But every benefit comes with a sacrifice. You have to be willing to sacrifice time to reap the rewards. You have to sacrifice your ego to continue to grow. And when you reach the place where you realize that you are successful, you need to sacrifice more. You can never rest on your laurels, you must continue to ask “How can I serve (my tribe, my planet, my team, my clients)” and “How can I make it better”.

One of the dangers for the passionate individuals who venture into business is to fall in love with their product or service. They are so enamoured of their amazing widget or delicious food or beautiful artistry or interesting website or matching fleet that they forget the most important part of being successful. You have to be in love with your people. Your clients, your customers, your employees…this is the secret of success. Your question should always be “How can I better serve them”. Great success comes only after great sacrifice. Great success also comes with a big responsibility, a responsibility to share and contribute and grow and to serve.

“What is important is seldom urgent and what is urgent is seldom important.” Dwight Eisenhower
Time. We all just have 24 hours in a day, yet why do people say they don’t have enough? It’s the most common excuse I hear, “I didn’t have enough time”. How is it that some people are able to accomplish so much more in their 24 hours than others?

When you are spending your time on what is important, instead of the urgent things that clamor so noisily for our attention, you get more time. Not more time exactly, but more time in the zone where it matters. It’s important to show your partner you love them daily through your words and actions, or you will have an urgent problem when you grow apart. Its important to pay your taxes, or you will definitely have an urgent issue when the Fed catches up with you. If you spend the time connecting with your team, working side by side and sharing and learning about who they are, when it’s crazy busy and you need a helping hand they will be there for you.

It takes focus and a conscious intent to spend your time on the important things that will help build the foundation for handling the inevitable urgent things that life brings your way. In our organization we train our leaders that the MOST important job they have is to support and be there for their team. Of course there are duties and tasks and responsibilities that are important to running a successful business, you have to place your vendor orders, make schedules, respond to emails, talk to clients…BUT you will always be running from behind, putting out fires, if you fail to understand the most simple truth. People are what matter. Your team will help you sail, or they will sink you. The deciding factor is if you have made the time to support them and be there for them – get this – When it matters to them. Not when it is convenient for you.

“Leadership and learning are indispensable to each other.”- President John F. Kennedy

Leaders are learners. You must be continually focused on your own growth, and the growth of those you lead in order to truly be a great leader. The fundamental counterbalance for the learning is teaching, and this is where what we are learning really sinks in.

When I share what I am learning with my people, I begin to see the impact it has on them and the way they interpret it. As we filter the lessons through our own interpretations and pass them along, the lessons get ingrained in our subconscious. It is so exciting to see someone light up as they gain a new awareness of something inside themselves that rings true. The feeling we get when we learn something new that just sounds right. For me, learning looks like this- I hear or read or discover something, and it resonates with what I already know. Or maybe it is some new way of looking at an issue that I never even thought of before, and as I take in the learning, it goes into a spot inside me, kind of a holding place. There it waits for the double verification from life situations that prove it true.

Sometimes what I have learned will come to me at the perfect time when I am coaching someone I am leading. This inspiration is truly magical. I love it when what I am learning shows up to me in real life situations. I remember distinctly one lesson that showed up in a painful way. I was reading about the importance of connection and touching a heart before asking for a hand. This is usually my instinctual way of being, I love people and appreciate them for what they contribute to not only my organization but to the world we live in. But I am far from perfect, and obviously still learning.

I was making a quick visit to one of my locations, and as I walked up to the building my eyes touched on the tables that had not been set up, even though we were 5 hours into the shift. I entered the restaurant and noticed several tables that had not been cleared, and one table with 2 guests that immediately flagged me over. I approached the table, and greeted the couple who were regulars at one of my other locations. They were quick to provide me with feedback about their visit. They brought to my attention the dirty tables and their perception of the lack of urgency in the service. I am always grateful for feedback, even when it is constructive. I thanked them and assured them I would be addressing their concerns and providing training to my team.

So far so good. Then it went south. I went to the office and my first words to the supervisor on duty went like this, “Hi Susie, those guests just complained to me that there were dirty tables for the entire time they were sitting here and that there was no sense of urgency from the staff to clean and service the dining room. Also the tables outside are not set up, and it is already 11 am. The tables need to be set up at opening.” Whew. That was the first domino. I did a quick walk through and settled myself in the office to catch up on some paperwork.

About 10 minutes later one of my team members came up and asked me if they could speak to me. I welcomed him in to the office and shut the door. “Hey Denica, I just wanted to say that I have always tried to be open to all the managers I work for, and I have had some difficult ones for sure. But I am really having a hard time with the supervisor on duty today. She just came up to me and said, ‘You need to keep the dining room clean.’ I explained to her that I had been very busy taking care of the guests, and that I was doing my best to keep the tables cleared. Her reply to me was, ‘Well, its not good enough, you just need to work harder.’ I really don’t appreciate her way of telling me, when I make it my priority always to give the best service possible to the guest.”

This was the immediate lesson to me in real time about the importance of connecting first. The negativity that was my first interaction with Susie swiftly got passed along the chain. Sometimes the real life examples of what we are learning are not pleasurable, but they are reminders nonetheless. I shared this lesson with Susie once I realized it, and apologized for my approach with her. When we learn the lesson, share it, the value you give to the people you are sharing it with is exceeded only by the value of learning what you teach.

Often these two words are used interchangeably, but in reality they are two different philosophies. Managers have employees, leaders have followers. Managers are in charge of developing and enforcing systems and processes, leaders are in charge of creating connection and vision. This is not only true in business, but also even more importantly in families. If you have kids, you are either managing them or leading them. Parenting in my opinion is the most important job we are entrusted with. We have been given young humans to love, keep safe, guide and lead to adulthood, so they can carry on and do the same with their children, or the people in their lives. When they are little managing is the mindset, you need to tell them what to do and where to go. You need to keep them away from the hot stove, and probably help them with their shoes so they are on the right feet. But there comes a time when you need to shift to leading. Telling them what to do doesn’t work once they reach that point where they realize they have a choice. When will that point be? You’ll know. You will face resistance. Your sweet little boy or girl will suddenly transform into a different being right before your eyes.

I remember vividly the moment this happened with one of my sons. He was always a super cooperative little guy, always ready to do whatever we asked and to help out with chores. He was 13 and we were at our cabin, and our dog needed to go out. We said “Hey son, we need you to take Buddy for a walk”, and he ignored us. We let this slide because hey, this kid always did as we asked. After some time went by and he still had not taken the dog, we told him again, “Son, Buddy needs to go-“. Suddenly a new person took the place of our cooperative young son. He stood up and said “I don’t want to. Why can’t someone else do it?” What ensued was a rising of tempers and escalating voices until finally we took the higher ground and let him slide. This was the moment of transition, the point when we needed to change our approach and stop managing him and start leading him. How do you know when that will happen? You’ll know. This means asking instead of telling when we need help. This is when to trust foundation you have laid while they were younger to stand firm as they venture into young adulthood.

Managers are maintainers, leaders are builders. What steps are you making in your life to be a leader?

When someone first comes on board, it is vital to spend the time to show them what the culture is. Use all of the resources you have to train them and bring them up to speed as soon as possible. But how long should it take? At what point to you begin to ask the question- Is this person trainable? There is no cookie-cutter answer to this, as everyone has a unique learning style. Plus, there is the added truth that the training never stops and you can’t stop even when they are already in the mix, performing independently.

Answering the question “is this person trainable” ultimately depends on the position they are in, as well as their track record of retaining and implementing the tools you give them to succeed. AND most importantly, their attitude.
Ask yourself these questions-
Have I spent the time with them to create a relationship of trust?
Have they bought in to me as their leader- will they do as I ask and need them to do?
Do they bring a positive attitude to the workplace?
Will they help their team members out when needed?
Do they show respect to the leader and to their team?
Are they making visible improvements in their performance?
Do they follow through consistently on the things that are important as opposed to urgent?

If the answers to any of these questions is “NO”, there is a problem. It starts with the leader- did you make sure they got the training and support required? But there is a limit to what a leader can do, essentially it comes down to the team member himself. He may not be a good fit despite your best efforts to on-board or rehabilitate him. The amount of time it takes to reach this realization will vary according to the level of experience of the leader and the team member, as well as the skill level required for the job. You should be able to make the call pretty quickly if your high-dollar bookkeeper doesn’t know the difference between a credit and a debit, for example, but may be more lenient with someone who has never had a job before.

It is never easy to transition someone off the team, especially in this current climate here in California. Everyone is hiring and so many business leaders I meet with share the challenge of finding and retaining quality people. Be that as it may, it will always cause more damage than good to keep someone on the team who is not on-board with the culture of the company.

Take a look at your team, acknowledge the blessing of the great individuals who are the core and are propelling and building your brand.
Look at yourself and ask the question- Am I focused on constantly improving, adding value to the people I lead, and becoming a greater leader?
And finally, ask yourself- Who do I need to transition off the team?

Marketing and innovation- the two words that are ingrained in my brain as the keys to continued business growth. We are always innovating, looking for the magic combination of services that will give our brand the perfect storm of success in our business. There are many more failed experiments than successful ones, but thank God we tried them otherwise I don’t believe we would find the ones that work. The ice cream machine was a definite fail. We thought it would be a hit when we added the soft serve machine to the Dublin location back in 2005. We had extended our hours and were open for dinner, but only until 8. We could not even give the ice cream away for free, let alone sell it, and the process of maintaining and cleaning the machine took over 90 minutes a day, something the salesman neglected telling us when we bought it. Not counting the fact that James and I both gained a considerable number of pounds after indulging in the all you can eat free ice cream that was suddenly at our disposal!

Those early days of being open for dinner in Dublin were also a fail, since we had not been ready to go all in and open late. We closed at 8 pm and didn’t have enought foresight to hire a manager despite the advice from our mentors. James was spread super thin, both opening the restaurant at 2:30 am as the baker and running the dinner shift until 9 pm at night. I was home with our young family and this was a super challenging time for us. It took us over 2 years to make the difficult decision to close the dinner service and go back to our model of breakfast-lunch.

Why was it so hard to make the business decisions of knowing when to change? For us it was tied up with our ego and not wanting to quit. I think any successful business leader would agree that you have to be willing to do whatever it takes to succeed. That can get twisted up when you have to make a decision to kill a project, it definitely did with us. Our financials didn’t lie, the extended hours were costing us more money than they were bringing in. Add to that the additional stress on our family since Dad was always coming and going to work and was tired as all heck. We wrangled for over a year whether to close for dinner, and when we finally made the call it was a sad day for both of us. It took just a short time for us to feel the relief of the added costs and stress that the dinner hours had caused on our family and to acknowledge that it was the right decision.

Why did it take us so long to make the call? Why did a giant like Kodak fail to make the innovations that could have ensured their continued success? Why did Blockbuster fall from the top? Ego and complacency. You have got to get your ego out of the way and look at not only the hard facts, but your intuition. Listen to new voices and be willing to try something new as well as to pull the plug on something that isn’t working. Never rest on your laurels, past performance does not automatically guarantee your future success. No one will argue that we live in a fast paced, rapidly changing world. You have to keep innovating and evolving your business and your leadership, or you will be left in the dust with the fallen giants. Being a leader means making the hard decisions, and also always looking for new voices and opportunities to add more value to your clients and the people you lead. Embrace change, and celebrate new ideas, even if they sound crazy. Change is made by the crazy ones, not the sheep. Crazy is good!