There are no shortcuts along the way to self improvement, and as a leader you must be focused on always improving yourself in order to improve anything outside yourself. It can be really hard when faced with the reality that you may not be operating to your fullest potential. I like to think of myself as the type of person who handles her stuff, I went into business for myself partly because I like to be in charge of my own actions and not be managed, or told what to do. Although I am confident now in my leadership and ability to create positive change, it wasn’t always the case.
For many years I put myself in the position of follower. My husband and partner is a strong, natural leader, so this was easy and not a bad thing, most of the time. Some of the qualities of a great leader are that they see the untapped potential in those they lead, set the vision bigger and clearer than most can imagine, and inspire others to grow and improve themselves. For a long time I was firmly stationed in a place where I believed, “This is how I am. I can’t help it. This is all I have.” Luckily for me, James loves me enough to not buy that BS, but I resisted. Each time we opened a new location, he was the driving force that made the lease negotiations, remodels, and openings happen, with me acting as his assistant, doing the support tasks that he needed. Each time we faced extreme tests on our relationship as partners and a couple, and I would often fail to rise to the level I needed to in order to maintain the momentum. When he would bring this to my attention, my reaction was to get defensive, to withdraw, and to want to quit. Emotions were high because we always have a clock ticking to get the locations opened before we are too far in the hole financially and have to pay rents with no money coming in, so our talks were rarely calm and reassuring.
It has only been as I focus on improving myself by working to overcome a life controlled by emotions and reactions that I have found my place as the leader of our organization. Improving yourself is not a destination, you cannot be satisfied with doing just enough to get by, or by quick fixes. Improvement requires a daily commitment, daily habits that work to rewire and rebuild your inner workings with intention. Many people underestimate the little things, but it is the little things, done daily with consistency that make the biggest impact. Change happens with or without our involvement or awareness. The question for us is will will grow and learn with the changes? Improvement is not “one and done”, it’s a process, day by day, decision by decision.